My God can take anything that I need to say to Him. I don’t have to sugar coat it, think it through, practice it, I just need to voice it. There is nothing I can say that will change that He loves me or how much He loves me. Nothing can take me from His hand (Romans 8:37-39) including my own words spoken while in the pain of a heart breaking moment. He loves me that much, enough to allow me, even encourage me, to speak up and let Him know my thoughts and feelings, my deepest hurts and disappointments, and what I’m angry about.
I learned that God can take anything I need to say to Him during the darkest, most difficult days of my life, when my precious son Garrett was killed in action.
The anger hit and it hit full force. I came to know an even more loving God than I’d known before. There were lots of “WHY?” and “Why MY son?” “Out of hundreds of thousands of soldiers, you let MY son die!” I would scream and cry and scream some more. I accused Him of not listening to me or answering my prayers. Many, many people had prayed in agreement for Garrett’s protection and safe return home. But NO, God had to take him home….home. Why?
Some days it helped me to go out to the backyard, pull weeds and talk to God. I would rip those weeds out of the ground with a vengeance and pray for answers. Other days, I would throw clay pots on the concrete drive in the back of the house and talk to God. There is something about breaking those pots that proved to be a great stress reliever. (I highly recommend it!) Some days our talks grew pretty loud. I’ve wondered and laughed at what my neighbors were thinking when they heard me.
I have to admit, a few times I wondered if I had overstepped the boundaries with God. How could I, this filthy rag servant, be so bold to speak to the King of Kings and Creator of Everything this way. But every time I wondered, I would hear Him say, “It’s okay, darlin’, tell me everything. I know you’re hurting and you don’t understand. Just keep talking to me.” If I had stopped talking to God, I’m certain that I would not be here today. But since I did keep praying, I’m certain that is the reason why I am healthy and have come this far in my healing.
He is so good, so faithful. So when you have the thought that you need to pray a certain way or you worry about how to say what you need to say, stop right there. Know that He wants to hear from you, however it comes out. Just talk to Him.
The Word says in Hebrews 4:16 to, “Come boldly before the throne of Grace”.
He means it.
And in I Peter 5:7, “Cast your cares on Him for He cares for you.”
He means it.
He’s a big, big God. He can take it. Talk to Him and be blessed.
If this spoke to you today, share it with a friend, it may speak to them as well.